So you worry a lot and constantly search for a way to stop worrying.
You are someone who is fixated on your worries all the time? You worry about work, money, relationships, your children, your parents, your health, your failures, and your unfulfilled goals. You worry all the time about time. You worry about getting what you want, and then you worry about keeping and losing those wants. The worst worry is worrying about the future.
Did you know worrying is a state of mind?
Yes, Worrying is a state in which your mind likes to sit when you do not know the outcome of most situations in your life. Constantly worrying makes your mind comfortable in this state, and then it becomes a solid habit of your mind to worry.
Worrying is just like most of the habits that you picked up in your childhood.
It comes from being raised in a very uncertain, emotionally and financially insecure, unhappy, and unpredictable home environment where everyone you looked up to as a child was always worried. They discussed their worries and lived in the fear of not knowing the outcome of it all. Not seeing worries go away or being overcome made you believe that when you worry you can’t do anything but just worry. And that is okay!
For anyone living in this world, entirely wiping out worrying is impractical because, ultimately, we are emotional beings and will worry about people, goals, dreams, and other important things in our lives.
To stop worrying, you need to attain Nirvana. Until you do that, this quote is everything that you need to remind yourself of when you start worrying again.
“Worry is a misuse of the imagination.” ― Dan Zadra
This famous quote is by a recognized author, book mentor, and strategic communications and creativity consultant, Dan Zadra.
I, like you all, worry a lot sometimes and I am patient with myself in this journey of becoming super worry less. I have accepted that completely letting go of worries is still a far point for me. However, thinking of this quote makes me use the state of worry as my playground to imagine infinite positive outcomes rather than imagining the worst ones. I am learning that once you develop a habit of replacing your imagination of the worst outcomes with the best outcomes out there. Your state of worry turns into a productive thinking state that is able to focus on more positive outcomes.
To make it easy to imagine the best outcomes possible out there and stop worrying. Follow these three steps.
1.Accept
Before you stop worrying, you need to accept that you are worried.
And if you are the -I don’t worry, don’t worry be happy or a worryless group of absolute beings then you can stop reading this article right here.
If you are still here, I know that you have already accepted that you are worried.
Acceptance is the first step to deal with your worries in a strategic way.
The idea is not to get rid of worrying but to deal with our worries with awareness. Accepting you are worried will wake you up to explore what it is that is worrying you.
Most of us are stubborn, and accepting our worrying patterns is like accepting that we have a problem. Choosing not to show it to make us look less vulnerable is what we do most of the time. We do this to protect ourselves.
The good news is this acceptance does not have to be done in front of others but just with yourselves. You can involve others later if you are comfortable.
Like I am going to make sure that I practice accepting I am worried in front of my future kickass children and close ones too so that they learn and understand that being worried is okay and share their worries openly with me so that as an adult I can help them learn how to imagine the best outcomes and have fun with your state of worry.
2. Ask
Once you accept that something is worrying you, ask yourself:
What is causing you to worry?
Are you worried about a physical, mental, financial, spiritual, or emotional condition you have?
Are you worried about your time? How worried are you? Are you worried to the point where you can escape it or to the point where your imagination is now involved and has started to think the worst?
Can you stop it before the outcome of your fear occurs?
Or you can only let go of it once your worry has been proven wrong? How easy is it for you to release it? Asking these questions will introduce you to your worrying patterns.
3. Change your response to your worries to stop worrying
You may all talk like mature people, and act old, but when worries arrive, you tackle them like the children in you would tackle a problem. The reason is you do not know how to tackle adult problems like an adult as you never even learn to overcome worries; you always give in to them.
So when anything worries you, you resort to your childhood way of handling these problems and you handle them poorly.
You go silent; you scream. You lose all perspective.
To change your response to your worries, you need to accept that you are now mature and big, that you do not have to be afraid like a child and tackle these worries like you used to when you were a child. Yes, it’s okay to change and it’s okay to have core inner values and stick to them when making important choices in life. Anything other than that, just remain open to changes and improvements.
Like it or not, we are going to change throughout our lives. We are never the same person, so how come things that worry us can remain the same?
So stop dealing with your worries like you would deal with them in your childhood. Those old ways would not work with your new worries.
You forget that adult life does not have to be as terrifying as our childhood.
Understanding this, our response to our subject of worry would change.
It is your life, and worry does not have to be a state of horror. Being an adult you can take control of your imagination in a much better way and focus it on valuable and pleasant things.
For example, when you worry about your future and imagine the worst things that will happen to you if you do not meet your certain goals. Use and force your mind to imagine the best things that you are going to experience when you have met all your bigger life goals.
My bigger goal in life is to serve this world and write helpful content. So, I post a blog daily, not worrying about how many people will read it but imagining that anyone who ever reads any of my blogs, benefits from the words I pour here.
Stop worrying and learn to use the state of worry to imagine great things and overcome all adverse situations.
Love
G
When not working, can usually be found reading a book, spending (perhaps a little too much) time meditating, practicing yog, or just vibing in the present moment like a mindfulness pro. And—despite claiming she knits very badly—she still picks up the needles now and then. Blogging to share her life learnings is her passion!